Joan: When he/she finally gets it

This material was referenced from Potty Training for Dummies, written by Diane Stafford and Jennifer Shoquist, M.D.

When that little hardcore balker finally gets a handle on his/her potty program -- and he/she will --be the first in line to congratulate them.

Check out those dry pants as often as possible right after she/he is trained, and let them know how proud you are of their efforts.

Keeping those rewards coming!

But don't dare heave a heavy sigh and assume you can slack off on the rewards. Not so fast. Hedge your bets by supplying a steady stream of good feedback: kudos from relatives, you're- such-a-big-kid acknowledgments from lead caregivers.

A child who is newly trained is still shaky, at best. So you have to reinforce the good stuff and make sure he/she stays trained.

Also, don't be too fast in proclaiming "great- you're done it!" Why? Simple. That may signal a second -wave protest; your toddler gets his/her back up and takes a new slant. like withholding bowel movements.

Saying, "I knew you could do it!"

Just because you feel like the weight of the world has been lifted from you shoulders -- thanks to her/him finally using the toilet -- don't assume that your child knows that you appreciate their efforts. What probably still looms large in your toddler's mind is how frustrated you seemed when he/she balked at using the potty- and when you switched gears and suddenly relinquished the reins entirely.

Clearly, he/she may be a bit confused by all of it. And, no doubt, she/he definitely needs you to jump in shower her/him with hugs and kisses and love declarations.

Naturally, if you try the ideas listed and your child continues to oppose potty training altogether, the see-your doctor definitely applies.

Do look forward to the completion of his/her potty training. But, don't make it your life. Then, one fine day, he/she will come to you and smillingly say, "Oui-oui, me wee!

A quiet celebration is in order. You don't need to break out the champagne; a simple spread of cookies and juice, served tea-party style, will do. Maybe an ice-cream drink.

Anyway, as you've surely guessed by now, most hardcore balker-kids are just channeling Frank Sinatra. Their mantra is -- and always will be -- "I did it my way."